These 10 things will ban you from ever having plastic surgery. Ever
Okay, no, not really. Not all of them are that serious. Some of them are merely cringe-worthy and you’re unlikely to do them anyway.
But this list is actually when a plastic surgeon should tell you “No,” when it comes to you getting that procedure of your dreams, according to the most current professional literature.
For the smoothest travels through the land of plastic surgery perfection, avoid these 10 sins despite, well, the temptations.
These 10 “disqualifiers” are part medical, part manners, and part everything else. But all of them are worth knowing if you plan to have plastic surgery with a board-certified plastic surgeon in the US or abroad.
1. If You’re (Very) Rude to Staff
Patients who are “rude to staff” should warrant “careful consideration” on the part of the plastic surgeon. Rude from the get-go, these patients according to long-term experience and multiple practices, are more hassle than anything.
If they are rude enough, clients and patrons of any business will eventually be turned down for service. The only added caveat is that with plastic surgeons, they’re looking at your manners (not critically I might add) and projecting that forward to when you come off the operating table and are…dissatisfied with everything. Your plastic surgeon doesn’t want to deal with that but will deal with reasonable dissatisfaction.
How rude would you have to be before a plastic surgeon turns you down? Very. But it happens often enough that manners have made the “Just say No” list in plastic surgery.
2. Stans & Fans: Worshiping Other People’s (Unnatural) Bodies
Teenage patients in particular are–according to professional literature–advised against being operated on if they are not adequately mature, both physically and emotionally.
Perhaps most importantly, the young patient’s desire for plastic surgery should be based on sound reasoning and real-world problems or desired improvements.
Wanting to look like a celebrity specifically does not qualify as a valid reason to spend several thousand dollars on a life-altering surgical procedure. Nor does social media.
But how likely are you to be turned down from a plastic surgeon for wanting to look like Kim K or Cardi B? In reality, not likely at all. But when it comes specifically to the young and apparently impressionable teen mind, looking like Kim K will have to wait until after your 18th birthday.
Because you should absolutely avoid that Miami chop shop plastic surgery center at all cost. Don’t tell your parents you’re headed to Mexico for a vacation if you’re actually going to Miami for surgery.
Deaths have happened that way.
3. If You’re a (Dishonest) Cigarette Smoker
According to the literature, there’s a debate over whether to operate at all on cigarette smokers. In reality, the only thing your surgeon truly cares about is whether you are honest about it. And you honestly have to stop. Smoking cigarettes as you prepare for plastic surgery is the second-worst idea in the world; right after stripmall surgery centers that make Miami’s nightly news.
When do you have to stop smoking and for how long? Exactly when your surgeon tells you to stop and until he says you can light up in celebration at a fantastic recovery.
Lying isn’t an option (nicotine tests are done pre-op), but there are other reasons you don’t want to say you’ve stopped smoking while you secretly are: Skin death, open wounds, scars that won’t heal, etc., etc. These are real.
If you’d like to know exactly what “the literature” says, it’s this: “Patients must stop smoking at least 4 weeks preoperatively” to be considered candidates for plastic surgery. At least. But again, your surgeon will let you know what his policy is depending on the specific procedure you’ll be having.
4. If You’re a SIMON, Not a SYLVIA
There is a well-known and semi-widely used acronym in the field of plastic surgery. Two of them actually: SIMON and SYLVIA. These terms are occasionally used to refer to patient types who are polar opposites.
Simon can be a nightmare of a patient. Sylvia is a dream patient.
In “Streamlining Cosmetic Surgery Patient Selection—Just Say No!,” Dr. Rod J Rohrich discuses this phenomenon:
“The major determinant for uniformly successful cosmetic surgery is proper patient selection,” he says.
“The acronym SIMON warns of potential problems in the Single, Immature Male who is Overly expectant and Narcissistic. This is in sharp contrast to the SYLVIA acronym describing the female patient who is a Secure, Young Listener who is Verbal, Intelligent, and Attractive.”
Does this mean that males make poor plastic surgery patients while female make good patients? No. It means that certain patients who fit the criteria outlined in the former are more often than not, not great candidates for cosmetic surgery. While women are the patients in 92 percent of cosmetic surgeries, men can and do also routinely make great candidates for plastic surgery, if they’d like to be.
5. If a Surgeon Doesn’t Like You
Finding or establishing common ground and rapport is important for both patient and provider. You don’t want a surgeon who dislikes you operating on you. Plastic surgeons are advised to avoid operating if they “don’t like an individual patient.”
Since each surgical procedure also represents a large sum of money changing hands, surgeons might be tempted to go ahead anyway and it may take a keen eye on the part of the patient to tell that their surgeon doesn’t actually like them.
6. If You Lie on Your Medical History
Your medical history determines whether or not you can safely undergo the several hour surgery that will be required to give you the face, breasts, or butt that you’re after.
Patients who lie to a plastic surgeon or their office staff when filling out medical questionnaires and when being asked about past or present drug use, medical episodes, diseases, and their lifestyle are doing themselves a disservice and putting a surgeon on dangerous grounds.
Despite elective cosmetic surgery being primarily about looks and beauty, it still requires real-world risks, incisions, blood, and even the breaking of bones depending on the procedure you’re getting.
7. If You Won’t Disrobe (Get Undressed) or be Examined Before Surgery
For your surgeon to be able to honestly and factually tell you whether something is or isn’t possible through surgery, or to give you a price for your procedure, that surgeon needs to see the person he or she will be operating.
Since many plastic surgery procedures are done on the midsection, breasts, and buttocks, consultations for these procedures do involve getting undressed.
How undressed do you need to get? That depends upon what procedure you are there for. You shouldn’t be asked to get entirely undressed for a breast augmentation consultation, but for a surgical vaginal rejuvenation procedure, you will.
A proper and safe Brazilian butt lift is preceded by a consultation that requires that the patient mostly undress. For facial plastic surgery, no undressing is needed during a consultation.
If you’re wondering whether your surgeon can simply see you in the near-nude only on the day that you come in for surgery, the answer is no, unfortunately not.
Not a credible surgeon at least. You should have seen the exact surgeon who will be performing your surgery well in advance of your surgery date.
Clinics that don’t allow this, or worse, who switch surgeons on a patient on the day of their surgery are not standard clinics but chop shops. Avoid. Avoid. Avoid.
8. Patients Who Are Paranoid, Delusional, or Depressed
Patients who are paranoid, delusional, or depressed should seek other forms of treatment and help before being operated on by a plastic surgeon.
9. If You’re a “Surgiholic”
Cosmetic surgery can do wonders for the right patient, but its procedures address only physical attributes. Patients who are trying to resolve feelings of low self-esteem or low self-worth, feelings of failure to fit in, and other similar mental and emotional conditions could be operated on endlessly and never see a resolution of their problems.
For this reason, plastic surgeons are advised to avoid treating “the surgiholic patient who has had multiple, previous operative procedures.”
If you merely have a sincere interest to improve your looks, or even wish to get yet another revision rhinoplasty, you likely don’t meet the definition of a surgiholic.
Think lifelike Barbie and some of the most popular plastic surgery fails, and there are your surgiholics. “Never enough, never, never.”
The media or a quick Google search of plastic surgery fails suggests that not all plastic surgeons actually abide by this professional suggestion, but again, surgeons who don’t are best avoided.
10. The Red Flag Zone
Next we enter the zone of red flags and high-risk signals that your surgeon will take mental note of. The following aren’t automatic “No’s,” as far as plastic surgery is concerned, but they change the patient-practitioner dynamic slightly and put the surgeon on alert for further red flags.
Too many of them presenting in one patient may eventually cause a surgeon to cancel:
- Patients Who Don’t Want Anyone to Know They’ve Had Surgery
- Patients in a Rush to Have Surgery
- Out-of-Town Patients Who Can’t Stay for Standard Recovery
- Patients who are “unkempt or unclean”
- Vague or Indecisive Patients
All things in moderation including moderation. It’s quite alright to see a plastic surgeon with a vague idea of what procedure you’d like, but you should have definite and predetermined ideals for the procedure.
For instance, you should be set on what you’d like to correct or change about yourself, even though you may not know whether you need a facelift or a neck lift in order to accomplish that look.
One sign of this vague indecisiveness–or of fear for the surgery–are patients who repeatedly ask the same questions at different preoperative consultations.
You should generally consider scheduling your plastic surgery about a year in advance, and should only do so after you’ve spent considerable time getting familiar with the procedure itself, following social media accounts related to plastic surgery, and seeing what results are and are not possible from the procedure.